For this particular Santa, who wanted to greet a happy, deliriously excited child, he must have been gravely disappointed. Instead, he was met by a screaming banshee who was terrified by the very nature of being popped on Santa’s lap that he peed himself! So much so that it leaked out the side of the nappy, went through all of his clothes and then, not so discreetly, soaked into Santa’s finest attire requiring poor old Santa not only to look very unimpressed but as we walked out of the “Winterland of shame” to the exit, we overheard him say;
“Jenny, I am going to have to change my trousers. I have a wet lap. Tell the other children I will be back in a moment! Tell them I have Santa duties to attend to with the chief Elf!”
I’m not sure why, but it made me really laugh. I think it was a nervous laugh, but also the fact that he stayed in character while telling Jenny The Cockney Elf this information when there were absolutely no other people around. Jenny, hastily and smiling awkwardly, bustled out of Santa’s grotto to the exit where we were waiting and said she hoped Austyn would be ok and to “have a nice Christmas, goodbye!”
When I mentioned that I wanted to view the photo’s, she was genuinely shocked and even more so when I asked to purchase a print of him screaming on Santa’s piddled on lap.
I can’t be the only parent to think photos like this are the best type of festive photos to send as the family Christmas card, can I?
Of course, I felt sorry for the poor little guy being scared and upset. I comforted him with lots of Mummy kisses, cuddles ‘n’ snuggles and the usual “naughty Mummy, she didn’t realise her little man wouldn’t like Father Christmas”, which made it all better.
And now, three years later, when we put the picture on the fridge, he always says, “Silly Austyn. It’s only Santa. I didn’t know, did I, Daddy?”
He must have got his reaction to Santa from his Mumma… I didn’t pee on him. But I feel my face says it all.